Black Plague of Death

Yes, yes..I'm posting already sheesh! . I think I'll begin with the death vomit disease that invaded our home last week, which I'm comparing to Black Death . Ok, so it wasn't that bad, but in all the sicknesses I've had I'd rank it right up under pneumonia as 2nd worse and one that I would only wish on my worst enemies. As a side note, if you are wondering if you're on my worst enemy list you can likely relax as by having this blog address you can be fairly certain you're not in danger. However, I am a scorpio and fickle as well as prone to hold grudges, so that could change at any moment. But, I digress.

So Tuesday night we go to pick up Miss Alanna last week and we get there to find out she has just puked on the daycare provider's couch. Ok, so a part of me was thrilled that it was her couch and not our car...selfish I know but a true thought nonetheless. We pick her up, comfort her and get her home to a fun-filled night of throw up, diapers, crying (both her and mommy) and finally sleep.

I make arrangements to dial in from home and do as much work as possible while caring for a sick child on Wednesday since she can't go to daycare.

Wednesday night we get a call from daycare....now our provider has the plague and there will be no daycare on Thursday. Did I mention that daycare is one of the best birth controls out there? In a panic we call in the cavalry....Scott & Lori! To the rescue the tag team watch Alanna all day Thursday.

Thursday night was our work party casino night. So off we go to gamble and have a good time. Except, we get there and near the end of the night I start feeling kinda woozy. I didn't have anything to drink other than water because we had driven together and I was the one driving us home. So, I tell Jeb that I'm not feeling that great. But, he's on a winning streak and wants to stay for the auction. He was having so much fun that I feel bad pulling him away. Off I go to hang out in the bathroom while waiting for him to finish the auction.

Onward to our 35 minute drive home....almost made it home...almost (I'll leave any other details out here just because you probably don't want to know, well aside from there still isn't puke in our car so that's a good thing). Spent the night miserable as well as the next day. Had to beg Jeb to stay home to care for Alanna because I could barely make it from the bedroom to the bathroom and back again let alone care for a 2 year old who still had to stay home from daycare.

So over the weekend from Thurs night until Sun afternoon I can't eat anything and can barely drink any water.

On a happy note, I'm down 13lbs for the month. Not really the best way to lose weight, but in light of feeling like death warmed over, I'll take it as a bonus.

The Value of a Dollar

So this weekend, I tried to teach Alanna about money. Last Christmas, we bought her a piggy bank . She loves her piggy and is constantly trying to sucker us out of coins to put in it. Then she will kiss the piggy. Perhaps this is an unhealthy relationship with money, but she's learning to save it and it's damn cute, so I haven't tried to change the behavior.

Piggy was getting awfully fat, so I decided it was time for a trip to the bank. We emptied Piggy's coins and birthday bills into a ziplock baggie and tucked it into her Dora purse. Then off to the bank we went.

At first when I put the coins on the counting tray, she was a little concerned because it was "mine money" as she told me. I said yes, but that we were going to trade in the coins for bills. As soon as the machine started, she was entranced and thrilled by watching the coins swirl around. We took her receipt to the cashier and she got her bills to put back in her purse.

I then explained that we could go to Target and she could shop for something to buy with her money. Or that she could save it and put it back in Piggy. At Target she was sooooo good and looked around for about 20 minutes, never running off, but seriously looking at things. She found a Wiggles Guitar that she really liked. I asked "Is that what you would like to buy?" She replied, "I like it, I buy it." Too cute! I melted on the spot.

I thought we'd have a battle at the checkout when she actually would have to give the cashier some of her money, but it was no problem She handed over the $16 and took her change then put it all back in her purse with mommy's help. When we got home, she showed Daddy and was so proud saying, "I bought it." Then we put her money back in her Piggy for another day.

Sick Kid

I hate feeling helpless. I'm not good at feeling helpless. Yes, I admit I'm a control freak and feeling helpless does not work for control freaks at all.

Alanna is sick today. She's got this squeaky lil voice from a sore throat and runny nose and fever. I have her believing now that her medicine is a "treat" and the Sudafed orange flavored chewable and Tylenol Meltaways help with that as they look like little candies. The bad side of my "treat" theory is that I have to be ultra careful (we already are) to make sure that she can't get her hands on the medicine as she now thinks it's a candy. I hate the feeling that I can't do much to make her feel better.

She has an MRI scheduled next week to take a look at the facial cyst and determine the best course of treatment. That makes me feel helpless too. They will have to sedate her so that she lies still in the machine. I've got this mommy guilt going on wondering if I'm doing the right thing by putting her through this. But I can't get over the fact that if we don't and something happens like infection or swelling that could compromise facial nerves that we'd regret it for the rest of her life.

Fuck helpless feelings.

Talking Toys

So one of my coworkers found this fun site of writing ideas here and wrote from one of the topics today. I'm in a rambling mood and one of the topics is near and dear to my heart right now.

So, I'm going to write about "What if Toys Could Talk?" Actually, I'm tweaking it a little bit to address the talking toys that have invaded my home over the past two Christmas/birthday seasons.

Last year, the first talking toy entered our household on Alanna's Birthday. Hug & Learn Baby Tad. We thought he was pretty cute and Alanna loved figuring out that if she pushed the shape that was lit up it would play a song. The "2 minutes until Night Night" started to get a little old and hearing him come on in the middle of the night in her crib when she'd roll over was a bit disturbing as well.

Then came the Chucky Doll of talking toys, for Christmas we got her SingALong Carebears . These little suckers are spooky as hell! Their heads move and they sing and recognize eachother. So, you'll push the hand of one and it will look at the other bear and say "Hi Wish Bear" or whatever then they'll start singing together. I keep expecting one of their heads to swivel and for it to be like the Clown Doll from Poltergeist . Damn, I hated that doll.

This Christmas, her aunt Hope and uncle Jer got her a Dusty the Talking Vacuum . This seemed like a cute idea as she's now really into pretend play and loves to help mommy with the housework. However, whoever designed this little monster had a sick and twisted time doing so...or a clean freak mother. I expected it to say things like, "It's fun to clean!" and "You missed a spot" or "Let's clean the carpet!" But Nooooooooo, this bugger is giving me a complex. She will roll it over the carpet and it says, "Who made this mess?" "Let's clean up this pigsty" It's giving me a complex over the cleanliness of my house.

And most recently the NUKFairy brought the Talking Vanity mentioned in a previous post. This one at least says nice things, but the biggest problem with all of these talking toys is that there is no volume control. The one toy with a volume control she has is a barnyard music thing that does different songs in animal sounds. Imagine Twinkle Twinkle sung by a chicken. The volume is right where she can figure it out though, so when we turn it down, she simply turns it back up or turns it off and on again to reset it.

Toymakers are sadistic fuckers.

Followup

NukFairy: This actually has gone very well this weekend (knock on wood). Friday night I snipped the tip off of the NUK and gave it to Alanna. She looked at it funny, then looked at me. I made this big happy deal out of it being broken and that meaning that the NUKFairy was going to come. She looked at it, said "broke" and then "No." and popped it in her mouth. Saturday morning it "disappeared" into the trash can and the big girl present arrived in her crib. She LOVED the little play vanity and at naptime only fussed for about 5 minutes when she realized the NUK was really gone for good. Same thing last night. About 5-10 minutes of mild fussing and then she fell asleep. So, I think it worked!

Wedding: Scott & Lori are now married and on their way to their Cruise as I write this. It was a very nice short ceremony and they both looked fantastic. I got about 30ish good pics and there were 4 other people taking pictures as well. Here's the link to the photos I took: Lori & Scott's Wedding.

NUK Fairy

Tonight's the night the NUK Fairy will be coming to visit. What's the NUK Fairy you ask? For those who are parents, you know exactly what a NUK is although in your home it may be referred to as a binky, plug, paci or some other name. Those who are not parents may believe it is something closer to this.

When we had Alanna, we vowed we would not use a NUK in our house. Well, one night Mommy caved in and really wanted sleep and *pop* in goes the NUK, sleep ensues and hence the point we are now at, which is a 2 year old with a pacifier. To our credit, we have been pretty good about weening her off of it. Since she was one, she is not allowed the NUK in the waking hours and only uses it at naptime and bedtime. However, the time has now come for the NUK to go away completely.

I consulted message boards for mommy's and talked to other parents and have decided that the way our NUK is going away is by method of NUK Fairy.
So, tonight I'm cutting the tip off the NUK so that it is broken. I'm hoping this is what will happen:

Alanna-- "Broke!"
Me-- "Yay! That means the NUK Fairy is coming and she'll take the NUK to fix it for a baby since you're a big girl now and don't need it anymore"
Alanna-- "Faiwy?"
Me-- "Yes, the NUK Fairy will come and bring you a Big Girl gift and take the NUK away for a baby. You're not a baby anymore, you're a Big Girl! Yay!"
Alanna-- "Ni Ni" and hands me the NUK complacently getting tucked in and going to sleep.

What will probably really happen:
Alanna-- "Broke!"
Me-- blah blah about NUK Fairy
Alanna-- "NOooooo! No no no no!!"
Me-- blah blah about NUK Fairy
Alanna-- "Noooo!!!!" Crying and tantrum ensues until she falls asleep
Mommy & Daddy take away the NUK, replace it with Big Girl Toy and awaken to only go through the same tantrum at naptime and bedtime tomorrow night.

Well, we can hope!

What's a Woogie??

So, yesterday Alanna presented me with a new word. Woogie. What in the world is a woogie???

Jeb is still in NC for work, so yesterday morning was a flurry of me getting ready and then quickly getting Alanna ready for daycare. As we were getting ready, I told her a bit about the Nuk fairy (which I will post later) and how Aunt Lori was going to come over for pizza that night. I get her coat, hat, scarf, boots & mittens on--she looked like a cute little snowman all bundled up. She looks at me with this indignant glare and states, "Woogie."

This conversation between me and my two year old ensued:
Me--"What's a woogie?"
Alanna--"Woogie."
Me-- "Honey, I don't know what a woogie is."
Alanna-- "Woogie!"
Me-- "Sweetheart, we need to go. I have your blankie and Nuk..is that what you want?"
Alanna-- "No!!! No, no no! Woogie!"

At this point, I've got the door open and her in my arms balanced heading outside.
During our drive to daycare, the conversation continues.

Me-- "We're going to go see Paula!" in my fun mommy voice.
Alanna-- "Woogie."
Me-- "Sweetie, I don't know what a woogie is, but won't it be fun at Paula's?"
Alanna--"No. Woogie!"

We get to daycare and I mention to Paula that I don't know what a woogie is, but that Alanna has been asking for it all morning and does she happen to know. Paula looks confused and says she has no idea either.

So, all day I'm trying to think through what in the world a woogie is and all that comes to mind is the movie Mr. Mom from the early 80's where the little boy calls his blankie a woogie. Well, Alanna can say "blankie", and I'm fairly certain she's never seen the movie so that can't be it.

I go to pick her up and as we're getting her coat on, this conversation occurs:
Me--"Let's go home and see Aunt Lori and have Pizza!"
Alanna-- "Za!! Woogie!"
Me-- "Lori"
Alanna-- "Wori"
Me-- (as it begins to dawn on my dumb mommy brain) "Who are we going to see?"
Alanna-- "Woogie!"

So, even though my daughter can say "Wori", she has chosen to rename Aunt Lori to Woogie. When Lori came over last night, she ran and gave her a hug and said "Woogie!!" We said "say Lori" to which she responds "Wori". Then we point at Lori and say "Who's this?" And the resounding answer:
"WOOGIE!!"

Congratulations, Aunt Woogie! You know I'm not letting that one go....she'll be Woogie forever now :)